We are all looking at the same tree for there is only one tree. Some of us, however, are standing in the sun, while others are standing in the shade.
There is no reality outside of the one inside your head. Everything, you think you see, is you. The "me" you think you see is still you.
Ever wonder why there is such resistance to changing racist ideology? Well you will understand after you watch this video, AND you will probably look at people who are racist differently and with more understanding.
United States or Divided States? It's time for a shift in the current narrative. Yes, I agree that Black Lives Matter, but I feel that just as that final line in the book "Animal Farm" states "All animals are equal but some are more equal than others," some black lives seem to matter more than others.
Some of us are guilty of a crime that is not yet punishable by law,although it should be. Word have power and we can use them to hurt or heal. The choice is ours.
Ever wonder how young children are capable of learning so much in Preschool, but the learning curve falls off often by second grade? Well, I have a theory...
This video is titled "DISAPPEARING FAMILIES"? because men, women and children are disappearing at alarming rates and no one seems to notice! Where are these precious mothers and fathers and children and why is there no public outcry?!
If we are created in the image of God, is it possible that we can be anything but perfect? Can we be ugly or flawed?
Every coin has two sides OR There is another way to view what is happening now in our world
A Letter to The President’s Economic Recovery Advisory Board:
We Are in a State of Emergency. Everybody Stop Talking for a minute and Listen…
I’ve made it- by nearly anyone’s standards. I completed my baccalaureate degree at a top university and I am a licensed white collar professional who can reside in any suburb without making the neighbors nervous. I dot my eyes and cross my t’s and live a pretty much ordinary textbook life. I, just like you, however are delusional or at least I was until just recently when life threw me a curve ball. See, just like a growing number of Americans who have had their sense of security blindsided; I was released from my position and had to join the ranks of the unemployed. This correspondence, however, is not about the high unemployment rate or about the flailing economy. This is an open letter to the American people about a problem -the real problem plaguing our society. The problem is Me-ism, which I define as the lack of compassion and responsibility we have for our fellow Americans, especially those who are disenfranchised and need our help the most. We have lost our sense of humanity and compassion for our fellow man, especially those less fortunate than ourselves. We simply do not care about the well-being of anyone but self and we have become blinded to our sense of responsibility to our society and anyone outside of our secure and sanitized communities. It takes an extended hand to heal a nation.
Growing up I was taught that If I worked hard in school and went to college that I could “make it” and one day achieve the American dream complete with a good job, a husband, a house, a car, 2.5 kids and a white picket fence. The truth, however, is that that is the reality of yesteryear. Statistically less and less people are getting and staying married and more and more people are forced into foreclosure and living below the poverty line. Jobs are being outsourced or relocating oversees so that production is more ‘cost effective’. The gap between the rich and the poor is growing ever wider and the middle-class is shrinking. Conservatives, Liberals and those on the fence all have fingers extended outward blaming and talking around the problem but no one REALLY wants to do the work necessary to eradicate what is REALLY strangling our society. They won’t even admit WHAT it is for fear that they may have to roll up their sleeves and get their manicured nails dirty.
Have you ever heard the saying “it takes a village to raise a child”? Well I am going to one up it. It takes an extended hand to heal a nation. Movies like Pay it Forward clearly demonstrate the importance of stepping outside of your small to do something bigger than you. Subscribing to the philosophy that we all swim or we all sink is imperative to the regeneration of this country. We, Americans, the USA, were once at the top of the world food chain in education, import/export, technology, military, etc. Today our children score lower on standardized tests than many lesser developed nations and we lag in educating those qualified enough to fill the growing demand for high-level technology, math, science and medical jobs. Why is this? We know why because even with our eyes closed we can see it clearly. We are leaving our poor, lower SES and shrinking middle class, the masses, behind in the pursuit of financial gain and we are missing an important lesson. A society, in order to function, must have a balance of management and labor- but in our effort to maximize the gap between the haves and the have-nots, we have created a nation in peril of becoming a third-world-country.
The Labor Force performs most efficiently, and progress is made, when one can make an honest living. An honest living means one is not struggling, one can get reasonably priced preventive medical care and one can, at a minimum, enjoy the fruits of his own labor. Contrary to economic forecasts of gloom and doom, our decline as a society has more to do with our lack of regard for our neighbor- or for “them” the poor than it has to do with any monetary mismanagement. As a society we have chosen the pursuit of excess and money, over humanity and we are reaping the fruits of our labor. Karma really is a bitch isn’t it?
In a depressed economy such as this where many have fallen beneath the cracks we, Americans, must supplement the lifestyle of those who are no longer viable. And yes it is as simple as that. It takes an extended hand to heal a nation. We are responsible for our brothers and sisters – like it or not. All that money that Mark Guttenberg gave to Newark, NJ is for naught if society doesn’t address the root of the problem which does not begin in the schools. It begins in my house, your house and in every house in America that has grown immune to the suffering of those NIMBY. We have surpassed being able to throw money at the problem. We are at the turning point in our history where if we are to survive as a superpower we all must roll up our sleeves and get our hands dirty. I can recall only one time period in my entire lifetime where ALL of America was united. Following the events of 911 one thing stands out in my mind. We were One Nation. Indivisible and anywhere you went around the country we shared the same sentiment, the same purpose and had the same goal. We were vested in the preservation of our great country and in ALL of its people. We were Americans and proud to be one cohesive unit. For this short period of time we put aside our class, gender, sexual preference, racial and religious differences and we stood together arm and arm to fight that which threatened our well-being. This is the only time in my life I considered the USA to literally be the UNITED states and it took this unfortunate event to remind us that we were not greater than the sum of our parts. It takes an extended hand to heal a nation.
If we do not become a nation of service to one another we will definitely see unparalleled instances of unrest like we haven’t seen in decades. Read your history for what lessons one fails to learn one is destined to repeat. I don’t know who first made that statement but it is as true today as it was then. We all must reach out to someone in need and grab just one hand. I do realize that this is a depressed economy but everyone can do something to benefit his neighbor. Deeds, though they may seem small to you, immensely impact the life of another and the effect is contagious? Unemployment, minimum wage and public assistance do little more to sustain a family, they will never thrive. Everyone, I am sure, knows of someone who can benefit from an act of kindness, be it money, food, clothing, temporary shelter, babysitting, mentoring or a kind word a held door and a smile. Even in this economy we can all share something with someone less fortunate even if it is as simple as volunteering at the local charity of your choice. One can donate Time for free and Time is priceless, and necessary if we are to escape “the nothing” depicted in the movie The Never-ending Story that we as a nation are becoming.
I faithfully tithe my Time, my Talent and my Treasure because I understand that US here in the USA are interconnected and interwoven into one another’s story. We need to be in service to our fellow man/woman/children for the survival of US all. The riots of the 1960’s were an explosive result of the unrest taking place in America long before the incident that most believe was the catalyst. People were emotionally, financially and physically exhausted just as today and equally as fearful. Those emotions are a volatile combination- again check your history, these emotions inevitably lead to acts of physical aggression. Although inner cities were predominately affected in the riots of the 1960’s, the damage permeated the entire economic infrastructure of the country. Let’s learn from the past and commit to people, not things. Every American, in his own residence, with an income has at minimum:
· Clothing:we all have gently used coats and clothing collecting dust that can bless another human being. Face it you will never again wear your ‘thin’ clothes.
· Supplies:we all have a basement, garage, attic full of things we don’t want or have upgraded and can’t use. Use Freecycle to give them a home, Use Craig’s list to sell them cheaply or simply donate them to the Salvation Army or any of a number of charities or shelters. People in transitional housing or those rebuilding their lives appreciate good books, dishes etc. also.
· Resources: drive a carless person to appointments, allow someone to make phone calls, take a carless person to the supermarket, watch children occasionally , if it’s inclement weather offer someone you trust who doesn’t have a car a ride
· Mentor:we are positive role models, take time out from your life and commit to mentoring a neighborhood latch-key kid or volunteer at a big brother/big sister type program.
· Food: donate to a local food pantry; we all have cans of things we don’t eat in the cabinet that hungry people would enjoy; feed a child or young struggling mother sometimes. If you know your neighbor is struggling, share your casserole
· Shelter: If you have a relative or friend or other that you trust, offer temporary shelter if you have an extra room or sofa. There are a growing number of homeless families, they are just like you and they deserve a break. It is an American travesty to have a 5 bedroom home where only two people reside.
It is unfortunate that the ‘holiday season’ is the only time that the average American takes notice of the needs of the many. One needs to note that in this economy those that reside in the suburbs will not be immune to the crime committed by the desperate. Some of the fallen could have possibly been your neighbor recently! It is, therefore, in your best interest to ensure those less fortunate can retain a modicum of their lifestyle and dignity. There is truth in the statement “what goes around goes ALL the way around” It takes and extended hand to heal a nation. I have personally extended my hand to three homeless females, two of which are mothers and I personally provided monetary, resources, mentoring, shelter, food, clothing, babysitting and time. All three are now thriving and I personally commit to opening a Transitional Housing Facility in Essex County, NJ that is a safe haven for all of my American family in need. My goal is to reach as many people as possible and provide the services necessary to return them to self-sufficiency through a network of agencies and partnerships. In closing, I have stopped talking and I have and will continue to get my hands dirty but I can only effect change locally. You are an important part of the solution. Now are you still talking or are you rolling up your sleeves?
I wrote this commentary and sent it to President Barack Obama and those named in the beginning of the paper in 2011. Today this still holds true so I just thought that I'd post it.
I wake up in the morning running a race;
Go to bed at night wash off my face
Lie awake contemplating –
All that I must do and the time I must borrow
Expectations, deadlines, pulled this way and that by you
Disguises, masks and hats, do what the world expects me to
Punch the clock, collect my pay …Everyday
Buying time on credit I can never pay
A scattered memory…
never saw it coming…
Disappearing silhouette, semblance of what was true
I was a sentence… then a word… now I’m just a syllable
Shell of a woman… hollow… through
I run myself ragged I have too much to do
Here you go another piece of my soul
Disappearing woman, no longer whole
Gave myself to everyone, Everyone else
Nothing left for me.
Gave nothing to myself
Mother daughter sunlight water earth moon and sky
Everything to everybody,
Wife, worker, mother, friend, lover
Remove one hat, one role,
just to put on another
Scattered pieces of me all over the place…
I no longer recognize …
which one is my face?
April 5, 2013 Day 9
Meeeshell… My Dell…
I recently got a new computer, a desktop with a fifteen inch monitor. Talk about excited! My old computer is a seven-year-old laptop that I bought used. This one is not quite out of the box but it is a definite upgrade considering what I’m used to. What a wonderful feeling… excitement… anticipation… new. Just to sit and learn my new system and to work on a keyboard with no missing keys where the letters are not rubbed off. Now this is one definition of joy if I do say so myself! I’m on YouTube watching a video when I hear a bizarre noise and get a blue screen- the blue screen of death is how it’s usually referred to. Holy Macaroni Batman this can’t be happening, Nooooooo! It’s amazing how only a few minutes ago I was floating on a rubber mattress in a pool with a fruity drink in my hand soaking up the sun without a care in the world. And now, only moments later, I’m standing at the edge of an empty pool wondering what happened to the water.
I work from home so my computer is my lifeline. What I’m doing here is not recreation, this is my job and I need my computer to be reliable, predictable and trustworthy. I cannot be in the middle of a document and BAM, I get a blue screen. Even if my work is backed up, how can I work comfortably if I cannot trust my computer to do its one and only job? Hmmmm, of course this computer incident had me cry out to the Lord. You know this is one of those save my butt times that I referred to earlier in my book. “Dear God please let my computer work, I need my computer, YOU more than anyone know that I can’t deal with this right about now. Thank YOU God Amen…” And, of course, she snaps right back after I reboot her but now there is an obstacle and this is exactly what went wrong in my relationship with God. I Don’t Trust My Computer Anymore! There I said it, I don’t trust God anymore. Wait that wasn’t what I said… but it’s what I meant…
It’s amazing the things you find out about yourself when you’re nuts. Oh yes, I’m not classifiable but I’m close… I talk to myself all of the time and I often have to catch myself that I’m not doing it in public. Now, I talk to Joy but I also answer and oftentimes it feels as if I am actually talking to someone else. Take now for instance. I’m sitting here complaining about my computer, to myself, when I step outside of Joy just long enough to recognize a parallel to my relationship with God. I’m either nuts or… well… I’m probably nuts, most creative people are and if you’re creative then- you’re probably nuts too. But of course, as usual I digress, wouldn’t be me if I didn’t. Where was I? Oh, so I remember something that happened when I was babysitting for my brother.
I had to take my six year old niece to swimming practice and then to the mall. No problem, easy enough, I’ve been entrusted with caring for a lot more than one child in my life. So we get ready to exit the house and she waits for me to hold her hand to walk to the car. Why? My brother lives on a busy street and my niece knows that she may not leave the front porch if an adult does not have her hand, even if the car is right in front of the house. She also knows that she is to always have the hand of a trusted adult whenever she is in public, in a parking lot, wherever… I can go on but I won’t. Suffice it to say she got the memo. Now, take six-year-old Joy or seven-year-old Joy the age is irrelevant. Maybe it’s actually more like thirteen or sixteen-year-old Joy when I let go of the hand of God. All of my life until that prophetic day I knew to always wait for God on the porch to hold my hand when I was leaving the house. Always wait for God’s hand in the parking lots or whenever I was going out for I was most certainly going to need God’s hand. But I let go at some point and I don’t know when or why? At this point it is more important that I realized that I let go and that I need more than anything to grab the hand of my Lord again. Whew… Wow… It’s prayer time.
Dear God, Thank YOU so much for the colorful metaphors that help me to see and to demonstrate the thoughts that are going through my overactive mind. Thank YOU for sending the tech help to get my computer repaired and for it not breaking my piggy bank. Thank YOU for all of the beautiful people YOU have sent and will send who will allow me to fellowship with them and will be interviewed. Thank YOU most for bringing me to this moment, this beautiful moment and realizing that I need to grab your hand again. Thank YOU for reminding me that I was the one who let go and that YOU didn’t let go of me. Please bring me back to the very moment that I let go of YOUR hand so that I can grab it again Lord. This time I promise to hold YOUR hand tightly… and to never again let it go…
Tonight Let’s Play Pretend
Just for today can we pretend,
that I’m more to you than just a friend
Make me believe when you look me in the eye.
Because tonight I need to touch something real
even if it's just a bold-faced lie
I’d rather pretend to have some thing
Than hand-fulls of nothing
Even if one night is all we've got
Because making love to a pretense is still making love
It feels good and it is just as hot
I will wear the blindfold
For I prefer to hold
a handful of illusion that the entirety of my real.
So tonight I’ll accept this here delusion…
and not think, baby
Tonight I'll just feel
Just for one night can we pretend
that I'm more to you than just a friend?
And can you NOT ask the question "Why?"
kiss me like I’m the one you can’t live without
The one you prayed for the one you dream about
our hungry bodies can't tell it's a lie
Don't make me defend this gift
It'll answer the question "What if..."
This--- actually becomes something REAL
Cause you're the medicine my body needs to HEAL
A Delicious Delusion my hunger longs to FEEL!
“In a blind taste test 50% of people who favored one over the other could not tell the difference between Pepsi and Coke…” www.amstat.org/misc/projects2013/1233.pdf
When you’re hungry and you’re coming off of a long fast, it’s important to carefully choose your first meal. When you’re horny and you’re coming off of a long celibacy, it’s important to carefully choose your first…AHEM… meal also. Don’t go to a club or a bar and bang a stranger who will be incapable of reaching the necessary level of intimacy. Choose a friend, someone you trust and honor him with the gift of you. He’ll appreciate it and who knows, maybe just maybe it’ll happen again and the two of you may come to realize that neither of you is pretending anymore…
Personalized Celebrations for women turning 4T and FABULOUS!
Includes Interactive Reading of 4T by Joianne Payne; Champagne Toast or Martini Raise; Socializing and mingling with Joianne Payne; Personalized "gift" for Birthday Honoree
*Does not include travel and accommodations
Includes Interactive Reading of 4T by Joianne Payne; Raising of the Tea and Toast; Socializing and mingling with Joianne Payne; Personalized "gift" for Birthday Honoree
*Does not include travel and accommodations
All books will be available in both digital and print format
This book is now available on amazon.com
This book will be available September 2020 on amazon.com
This book is in production and projected to be launched December 2020.
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